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So it appears my blog has picked up a life of it's own. So I'll be back to blogging about the city of Cleveland, our beloved sports teams and the milfs, cougars and smokes who live here.

City in Oklahoma has worms in their drinking water

First of all, I think this town in Oklahoma is fooling themselves by warning people not to brush their teeth with this water. Seriously, you know no one in the city is brushing their teeth. But hey, A for effort for trying to convince the outside world.

How about the real life Cletus Spuckler from the Simpsons, playing the city water director. Not even a hair can get through your water filter? Well then guess what, they're coming through somewhere else genius! And again, your job as city water director isn't telling the town not to brush their teeth, history and genetics has a way of passing that information down

Detroit literally can't afford paper

Detroit’s funeral directors received this unusual text message last month. “FYI, city of Detroit can’t process death certificates because they have no paper and don’t have money to buy any.” 

The message, from a fellow funeral director, was mostly true: The city did stop issuing certified copies of birth and death certificates on July 23, days after the July 18 bankruptcy filing. That day, a nervous paper vendor demanded cash — and the city wanted to do business as usual, on credit. 

From The Detroit News: http://www.detroitnews.com/article/20130829/METRO01/308290046#ixzz2dNLOvE8c

Well, I'm officially moving to Detroit. Not because I can buy a house for a penny, but because, you literally, can't legally die in the city. Eventhough by moving to Detroit, you will more than likely die sooner, rather than later, it's the whole tree falling in the forest thing. If no one is around to legally confirm it, you're technically not dead.

How bad off financially do you have to be to not be able to afford a piece of paper. It's basically the least expensive thing on the planet. And nice FYI message Detroit. Were you looking for some pity on behalf of the funeral directors? Secretly hoping that by sending out a FYI text message, the director will bring you a couple of reams of paper?

Ohio couple rips script straight from the Notebook

A grandson of an Ohio couple who died at a nursing home on the same day after 65 years of marriage credits their faith in God for the “shocking” timing. 

Jeff Simon, 20, of Russia, Ohio, told FoxNews.com that his grandparents, Ruth, 89, and Harold “Doc” Knapke, 91, met in the third grade and continued a torrid love affair until Aug. 11, when the devoted pair died just days before their 66th wedding anniversary in the room they shared on a nursing home in Versailles in western Ohio.  

“In the last couple of days before their deaths, we kind of saw it coming,” Simon said. “My grandfather has always kind of been in not very good health, but the fact that he went that morning was very shocking.”  

Simon said his grandparents — who had a joint funeral Mass, with granddaughters carrying Ruth's casket and grandsons carrying Harold's — loved each other “very much” and enjoyed playing cards together for countless hours.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/08/26/ohio-couple-married-65-years-die-in-nursing-home-11-hours-apart/#ixzz2dDpAKtCU

First, yes I have seen The Notebook and no, that doesn't make me gay. It's only the greatest love story ever told, NBD. Also, I went with a girl, so that makes me the opposite of gay. Anywho, great love story out of Ohio. I now consider it to be the greatest of all time. And no, reading and liking this story does not make me gay. Right?

8-year-old Cleveland Indians fan with cerebral palsy rips script straight from Seinfeld

Cleveland - Niko Lanzarotta is an 8-year-old Cleveland Indians fan with cerebral palsy. Saturday before the Indians' tilt with the Twins, Niko and his family were fortunate enough to be on the field during batting practice. And Niko got to meet two of his favorite players: Jason Kipnis and Carlos Santana.  

He asked them to each hit a home run for him during the game. And they both delivered, en route to a 7-2 victory. http://www.cbssports.com/mlb/eye-on-baseball/23318258/jason-kipnis-carlos-santana-come-through-for-child

If T.V. has taught anything, it's that any life scenario can be tied into a Seinfield Episode. But this kid took it to a new level. Just straight ripped the script from Larry David. Asking for not one, but two homeruns? Let me guess what's next, kid suggests switching the Indians uniforms from polyester to cotton? After that he claims he saw Gaylord Perry dunking his donuts? Ohh that Niko. Just like Kramer

No other person sums the series up as brilliantly as Boomhauer. Dang ole show about nothing.

Guy steals OVI check point sign

YOUNGSTOWN - William Toth, 42, of 1694 Mahoning Ave., was charged with theft at 12:57 a.m. Saturday after officers working an Operating a Vehicle Impaired checkpoint on Mahoning and Belle Vista avenues observed him taking their OVI checkpoint sign and running off with it.  

Officers caught up with him not far away and took him into custody. He was released after being issued a summons to appear in court.  

Police said he took the sign after parking his car on Lakeview Avenue and walking west on Mahoning Avenue to 1716 Mahoning, where the sign was located. http://www.vindy.com/news/2013/aug/24/west-side-man-charged-with-stealing-cops/?nw

This would be the complete piece of any Mancave. I guarantee you no one has the DUI checkpoint sign hanging up on their walls. You walk down in someone's basement, you see the typical stop sign, the typical "Indians Fans Parking Only" sign. But do you ever see Sobriety Check Point Ahead sign? Hell no.

If this isn't the next John Belushi poster, I don't know what can be. This should be a poster hung on every college kids dorm room wall. Why it isn't, is beyond me is beyond me. I think William Toth is the modern day Forest Gump, shit happens, bumper sticker dude.

Katie Witham get worse looking by the hour

I have a feeling that after Fox Sports takes over STO fully, we will see Katie taken off the broadcast. It's one thing if you're good at your job, but you just don't have the looks. But it's another when you totally have no clue what's going and look like this. Sorry Katie, not to be mean, but American's 6th sport in Soccer, is your life's calling.